|
 REQUIEM FOR A FRIEND
A personal open letter to our Gothic Community/Family:
In loving memory of one of our own.
This is for Kenneth E. Fudge. Most of us knew him as just "Ken," and
some as his writing pseudonym "Dr. Burn." He was born on Friday, July
2, 1948, and he passed from this life on Tuesday, February the 11th,
2003.
Ken and I both worked at a funeral home. That's where we met. In a
very professional atmosphere, where our kind tend to tone down to as
"normal" as we can without losing our greater self in a world of suits
and ties, that is where our friendship was born and flourished.
I'll never forget the first thing Ken said to me when he met me for
the first time. He made sure no one was around to hear, and he said,
"I know you," and -tongue in cheek- with every bit of humor he said,
"You're a vampyre aren't you?" I laughed out loud, and said in a
whisper, "Why does it show that much?" In that moment I knew that Ken
and I would be lifelong friends. Nothing could have prepared me for
the shortness of that time, and as I sit and write this, my own
memories of "all things Ken," as he would say towards the end, I do so
with a heavy heart and a sad smile.
It wasn't long after we met that we discovered many common interests,
from our love of Gothic music, to our personal dark aesthetic, from
our more spiritual inclinations, and love of books, even to writing
for Movement Magazine, something Ken had started doing, and something
I had not done in quite some time.
Ken had many ideas for our Gothic Scene. He saw many ways to improve
upon it, and he took the initiative to encourage fetish shows at the
Infinity/Fat Kat on Goth Night. He tried to reintroduce some of our
older, and much loved music that many of us old school Goth's miss
terribly, and he also attempted to encourage our own participation
with the new an eclectic. It was Ken that ended my own three-year
sabbatical, by inviting me to come out to the club, (until I finally
came out again), and by keeping me informed on current events, as they
were happening in the scene.
Ken also had plans for me. He had plans to interview me for Movement,
in an effort to help me find new local people, musicians that I could
work with on new projects, and thereby lend my voice to our music once
again. It was Ken who inspired many ideas in the vampire community as
well. Part of this he did by encouraging role-players to fill the club
and thereby strengthen and support our Gothic community. He assisted
the club in getting more people in our Communities to come out to
support the scene, so that we could continue to have a place in
Jacksonville. Ken had many ideas about vampyric images on water
bottles for the club, in fact, he wanted to use my image for one of
his designs. He was even trying to encourage the club to carry some
good red wine. Ken knew that if the club stocked it, they could make
their money back on one or two glasses, and the rest would be profit.
Ken always had new business ideas to promote our Scene, and he was
constantly coming up with get-rich-quick schemes to make money, which
he then planned to use to make things better for all of us. Up until
the very end, Ken was more concerned about making the rest of us
comfortable with the fact that he would be leaving us soon.
For as long as I knew him, which was about 2 years, Ken was always
polite, soft-spoken, eloquent, and never demanding. He could be
persistent, though, and it was this very persistence of his that set
things in motion on many levels, throughout the Goth community both in
Jacksonville and many outlying areas.
Ken's influence was both subtle and effective. He dreamed of creating
a scene in this city to rival that of the larger cities, like Atlanta
where he had also lived for some time, before returning to
Jacksonville, his hometown. I believe that Ken's dream will be
realized in the years to come, as an effect of those things that he
himself set into motion through Movement and other venues.
Words cannot express the depth of our Community's loss at his passing.
The Gothic Community as a whole has lost a powerful ally and a
dedicated friend. We have gained the lesson of a life well lived, and
we now have the understanding that comes from watching first hand-
just how much difference one special person can make. For myself, like
many of you, I have lost a very dear friend; a member of my own
extended family- that family that is not born to us, but the family
that we find as we live in the world. I have gained, as many of us
have, the richness of the tapestry of life that comes from knowing and
remembering one such as Ken, a powerful soul. Someone who walked among
us, and cared.
Ken used to tell me, while we were working up at the Funeral Home
together that he was "the man with no life.¨ He would say this with an
expression that made it very funny, and we would laugh, but I have to
say now in all seriousness, Ken, you had a life, a wonderful and
powerful life, and with it you touched the lives of many. We will
remember you. Your influence on our city of Jacksonville and within
our small Gothic Community will continue to be felt through out the
many years.
Rest in the knowledge that we love you, my friend.
Of a Darkerlyte,
Azra Medea
|
